Huzzah and hello, for today is the day I put on my big-girl marketing pants (which don’t fit well and WHY ARE THEY SO ITCHY) to give you 7 Reasons to Pre-Order Flights From the Rock. Flights is a beautiful anthology of speculative flight stories releasing July 14th, 2019, to commemorate the 100th anniversary of the first non-stop Trans-Atlantic flight from Newfoundland (AKA the Rock) to Ireland. A century ago, Alcock and Brown spent June 12th preparing to launch their epic flight. This June 12th, we’re preparing the epic launch of our own flights, and I’m here to give you 7 Reasons to pre-order your Flights from the Rock ebook today:
1. everyone knows advance tickets, especially for Flights, are best booked and ordered in advance. The more advance the better. In fact, I’m pretty sure the best day to order THIS flight is today.
2.Complimentary pretzels!! And by pretzels I mean a mind-contorting glimpse into my loopy imagination… via my story, Borrowed Wings, found in Flights from the Rock and which may or may not be about the living taxidermy of damaged fairy wings. Twisty. Like pretzels (no regretzels!).
The thing about pretzels is that you’re also going to need something to drink, which brings us to reason #3 why you should pre-order Flights from the Rock today:
3. we’ll let you carry liquids bigger than 100 ml on this flight, bay-bee. Heck, you can read this ebook with a coffee mug/teacup/wine glass the size of your head if that’s your Best Self. You want to soar into the blue beyond on the the wings of your imagination from the comfort of your overflowing bathtub? Go for it.
4. On Flights from the Rock, there are no economy class seats. Every seat is a first-class trip to Imagination-town.
5. woke up to discover your passport expired/lost/chewed to bits by your imaginary hellhound Cerberus IV? No problem. The Flights from the Rock ebook will be sent to your device on July 14th by Amazon’s magical ‘whispernet’ and promises not to ask for your passport, I.D., or rifle through your luggage (some exceptions may apply if your e-reader has picked up a poltergeist, haunted virus, or is possessed by a demonic librarian).
6. no extra travel insurance needed! Flights from the Rock‘s Armchair Airlines is covered by your existing health insurance/Medicare so you can feel secure no matter how lost you get in our stories.
7. By pre-ordering your e-copy for $2.99 today, June 12th, you will help my squadron of story-eyed pen pilots defeat the algorithm bombers and soar us to the top of Amazon’s Ace-sellers list, making you a hero and all of us victorious over the lows of reality, gravity, and all the other -itys.
E-copies will be landing on July 11th, a few days before the official release July 14th, as a thank-you for helping our mission. Pre-orders are available for $2.99 (Canadian funds) by clicking here. Armchair Airlines thanks you for your patronage. And so do I! *hugs you after asking permission*